Cops Say the Darndest Things | DBKP - Death By 1000 Papercuts - DBKP
viagra payday loans

Cops Say the Darndest Things

February 7, 2008
By

16 Real Cop Comments

These 16 Police Comments were taken off actual police car videos around the country:

#16 “You know, stop lights don’t come any redder that the one you just went through.”

#15 “Relax, the handcuffs are tight because they’re new. They’ll stretch after you wear them a while.”

# 14 “If you take your hands off the car, I’ll make your birth certificate a worthless document.”

#13 “If you run, you’ll only go to jail tired.”

#12 “Can you run faster than 1200 feet per second? Because that’s the speed of the bullet that’ll be chasing you.”

#11 “You don’t know how fast you were going? I guess that means I can write anything I want to on the ticket, huh?”

#10 “Yes, sir, you can talk to the shift supervisor, but I don’t think it will help. Oh, did I mention that I’m the shift supervisor?

#9 “Warning! You want a warning? O.K., I’m warning you not to do that again or I’ll give you another ticket.

#8 “The answer to this last question will determine whether you are drunk or not. Was Mickey Mouse a cat or a dog?”

#7 “Fair? You want me to be fair? Listen, fair is a place where you go to ride on rides, eat cotton candy and corn dogs and step in monkey poop.”

#6 “Yeah, we have a quota. Two more tickets and my wife gets a toaster oven.”

#5 “In God we trust, all others we run through NCIC.”

#4 “How big were those ‘Just two beers’ you say you had?”

#3 “No sir, we don’t have quotas anymore. We used to, but now we’re allowed to write as many tickets as we can.”

#2 “I’m glad to hear that Chief (of Police) Hawker is a personal friend of yours. So you know someone who can post your bail.”

AND THE WINNER IS:

#1 “You didn’t think they arrested pretty women? You’re right, we don’t. you have the right to…

by RidesAPaleHorse
images: email

Digg!

Originally posted at:

DBKP@Blogger.

Bookmark and Share:

Tags: , , ,

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

Mondo Frazier Award 2012

DBKP Google Search

Featured on FARK:
The Day Calvin and Hobbes Died

boing boing logo Featured on BOING BOING:
Spate of Hidden Sharpened Spikes Found in Lake, Parks
Lucianne Front Page Your Thursday BlogBlockBuster: Leave it to our beloved bloggers
Featured on Rush Limbaugh: John Edwards Affair: Dr. Strangelove, the “Favorite” Film Edwards Never Saw

Save Freedom of Speech

Stop CAIR
INVESTIGATE CAIR

Pajamas Media BlogRoll Member

DBKP Sections

Raves For DBKP!

    If the linked blogger wasnt a moron - Tangaroa

    ...one idiot editor - The Sword

    you guys are truly morons - Chris Brunner

    ....Iranian propaganda - mostreliable

    ...Who writes your blabber? - MA

    ...ARRRRGH! BLOGSPAM!!!!! - raisputin3

    ..incredibly dishonest blog posting - Roger Strong

    ...nobody needs your take on an article...who dug this hacky spam up anyhow? - superdoofus

    ...Iranian propaganda only this time the source of information is some idiot's BLOG - dlibert

    I wonder if Bill the bigot will put this site(death by 1000 papercuts) on his show as an example of the right wing hate sites? - Kid Funkadelic

    ...Ah, the Support Mindless Jingoism blog - Ryan Thompson

    I get it now. The know-nothing editor of this blog just keeps POSTING THE SAME GARBAGE over and over again.. - framecop

    How stupid are you? - Ann Elise

    Idiotic conspiracy theorist...dumbass - Hopefull

Want Conservative Chat?
Your Ad Here
Otherwhere Banner